This past weekend 1/17/00, I sent out over 50 resumes and emails. The
response has been abismal. I truly had hoped that 2000 would be an era
of new beginnings and improvement instead things seem to have worsened.
Facts
My monthly expenses are about $500.00+ Minimum
My income at this point less than $150.00
My webpages are paid thru for 2 years
I Owe and must repay a friend $383.04 for that
Some income will trickle in from the pages
My home,once my pride, is falling in disrepair
I'll have to sell it before matters worsen
A good portion of that $$ has to go for my moms care
Ive had no luck getting a roomate or partner
I see little hope for change at this stage
Ill have to store 8 rooms of furnishings $$$$$
Ill have to rent a place to stay $$$$
In either instance I can't afford it
Ive tried to be an optimist and given it my all
Apparently Ive become a throw away person in this society
Still I can't collect Social Security not of age and my
Unemployment ran out two years ago.
All I can say is don't get old
They say never give hope, there is always a solution
Have faith. Well Im a believer in that but I have had
at this point two years of hell and gone thru all my savings.
I am little less optimistic of a good resolve here.I have
heard from some very nice chaps but Ive also shunned
them ashamed of my own circusmtances. Im a person that has always
been able to handle just about anything, now I kind of
wonder about that and myself. Im only 57 but if this is how things
are now imagine a few years from now. I can't cover bare
essentials now and have existed the past two years through
a lot of creative finance and the help of family and a few
good friends. But this just isn't a life any more Im sad to
say and change is drastically needed. How I dont know but
confronting it head on and forcing the issue might just
bring forth something positive for a change.
Im still desirous of someone in my life but its not fair
to even consider it considering my financial situation. I
wouldnt want to cause anyone burden or due stress on any
possible relationship. But whats sad is not even having anywhere
to turn for sound advice, support or comfort. There are some of
that have been very kind and its kept my spirits up, but its not
been an easy road , lets pray the morrow will be better.
